Everything Is Fine - Really!

I’m afraid I have only one thing on my mind tonight. Everything is truly fine. I went to the doctor today for a routine exam. There is absolutely nothing wrong. But because I am about to turn fifty, the doctor had a laundry list of questions, concerns and tests to be run. I posted about this doctor last year. Little has changed, except I am better prepared for who she is and how she interacts with her patients.

What I find myself thinking a lot about is this: from an emotional standpoint, I keep reminding myself that I will be the same person on the last day that I will be 49, as I will be on the first day I turn 50. But because I am crossing a chronological line, I am being grouped statistically in a new actuarial group. Worse still, it is a different medical actuarial group. I understand that many tests are part of preventive medicine rather than diagnostic. They provide a baseline of what is “normal” for an individual and allow problems to be caught early. Trust me, I have followed the rules about such things for many, many years. But today felt different. Even my previous prince of a doctor had told me that when I reached fifty, we would look at some things and reevaluate strategies. However, I believe he would have handled today quite differently.

It’s hard not to feel happy, excited and, yes, a little scared as I reach a half century on the planet. It’s also hard not to get scared about growing older in general and menopause in particular or as I like to call it “That Which Shall Not Be Named”! Especially when I watch a television ad they run here in the U.S.. It shows a woman with little sparkly bits flying out of her body. Turns out the little sparkly bits are her bones being ravaged by osteoporosis! The voiceover starts to talk about menopause and I vacillate between wanting to throw a shoe at the T.V. and fighting down a wave of panic!

Not throwing shoes...
Breathing now...
;o)