Wednesday, July 29, 2009


There are moments when the experiences, the health problems, the stubbornness, the worries, the confusion and the fears of our ERs (Elderly Relatives) can really get to me. I think I cope pretty well day in and day out with whatever comes up. But it’s those middle of the night can’t get back to sleep moments, when I start to worry that someday I am going to wake up and be just like them. By “just like them” I am referring only to the troubling parts. I never wake up in the middle of the night and think “Gee, one of these days I am going to wake up and be just as open hearted, open minded and full of life as my octogenarian friend Marion!” Plus, it usually takes Chuck to remind me that I am not really like any of these ERs to begin with. I am, in fact, just like me. Nor will I wake up one day and suddenly be old. Every day I will simply be one day older than the day before. And what really matters is the age in my soul.

With all that in mind, I bring you this quote:

“Age only matters when one is aging.
Now that I have arrived at a great age,
I might just as well be twenty.”

- Pablo Picasso (1881 - 1973)


RoasterBoy said...

We've had several conversations with our family, asking for forgiveness in advance for the strange things that we might say and do as we age. We've also made the commitment that, to the best of our ability, we'll treat our family members with respect and honesty. This isn't a Get out of Jail Card, but a recognition that there's a good likelihood that we'll get weird(er) as we age. Mostly, that's a good thing and may even be fun, but the risk of things going sideways is too great.

dancingmorganmouse said...

I have the same thoughts, and hope Chuck is right, that you don't suddenly just wake up old. With luck it will just creep up on us and we won't even notice.

Anonymous said...

Excellent post.. I know I'm not quite where you are yet.. but I also worry about these things. For me, I never want my mind to go.. the body parts seem trivial compared to what it must be like if you go senile. I totally agree with you that age is really how old you are in your soul. And knowing you, you're a mere 21!!!
Ronnie xx

Pink Granite said...

Hi RoasterBoy -
I think it's terrific that you've been having conversations with your family members. It makes so much sense to lay our cards on the table and be prepared for any and all eventualities.
I too hope it will prove to be fun!
- Lee

Hi DMM -
When I turned 50, I noticed that being 49 years and 364 days was identical to being one day older than that!
I've heard it said that as we age we grow more like ourselves - sort of a more concentrated version! I'm hoping that only my best qualities get more intense!
- Lee

Hi Ronnie -
Senility and Alzheimer's scare the daylights out of me as well.
As for the age of my soul, thank you for the compliment! But I think I would pick 31 rather than 21. By 31, I was older, smarter and making better choices!
- Lee

Sue said...

Age is but a number... still, the idea of getting old is a frightening one and it's very sad to see your family, especially parents, getting older and frailer. My dad is having some serious health problems at the moment and it's frighteing. My personal belief towards aging is that we just have to go with the flow. Take each day as it comes and make the most of it. I do this even now, life is fragile. I don't believe that I'll grow older being one of those grumpy grannies who complain over every ache and pain. You just have to do these things gracefully!!